~About Me~
Ee Lin
of CLS
Read the blog...and comment...
my e-mail:madden_dreamer@live.com.my
my facebook as well....
I feel...
wrong at times....yet feel so right.....sometimes very confuse....I'm NUMB...I'M DEAD!!!!I HATE PLEASING PPL...GETTIN REALLY TIRED WITH THE HIPOCRITS...
what you can buy me for Christmas...
hmmm....thats a good question....
maybe u can get me a brand new tennis racquet....hahaha...that be good...AIN'T IT???
AND of coz would be my fav author Judith McNaught books...which *Denise always shakes her head*
BESIDES THAT i would really appreciate it if i get an IPOD...a guitar too perhaps.....HAHAHA.....askin too much
how many of us out there has actually hav doubt bout ourselves???how many of us has actually ask ourselves before how much do we really know ourselves???i dont know becoz right know there's a gap between me n myself....i just got a really big slap from a friend....not really a slap but literally...i finally realize there's nothing much that i know bout myself besides being a loner....i dont knw really...he says i'm confident,sense urgency in me,unsure,curious,lonely,left out,hopeful firm,hasty....how much of that is true now???now that i have doubt on myself....i really dont knw...i'm lost with no where to go...now i'm also naive n inexperience.....i really dont know...i'm starting to hav doubt bout how much do i really know myself....he says guilt is something that i cannot take....he says i try meekly to be righteous...he says i'm filll with naive thoughts which r childlike...he says i try to understand the world but wont let the world teach me....i really dont know....am i trying too hard to be who i'm not???i'm starting to hav lots of doubt...how much do i really understand myself????just how much he says bout me is true????he says i'm too human...but arent we all????i just dont understand!!!!!
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1:53 AM
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Friday, August 7, 2009
it's really time for a change....i had had enough n tolerated enough of my idiotic dad's nonsense....I AM TO REBEL!!!!!sad to say but good to know.... i hate him n will never change the fact of it...for those of u out there who has a dad who is considarate n reasonable who doesnt scream n shout at u for no reason then good for u.....for those who hate their dad as hw i hate mine...then do join the club!!!!lets just start from yesterdays incident...ok i just got my P recently n i havent even been out on the road driving for more then a week...n i'm still nt use to driving an auto,big car...n i'm not use to it n dont expect me to know hw to look at all 3 mirrors at the same time when i'm still learning!!!!if he ever hav the brains in him to think he would know but too bad he doesnt hav!!!!he shouted at me yelling quote 'I DONT KNOW HOW U CN EVEN PASS UR DRIVING TEST!!!!' that was the last of it....i had enough!!!!!another incident is comparing me to his friends kids who r way much older than me who r either already workin or just graduated from either college or university!!!!!JESUS!!!!!DOESNT HE REALIZE FOR THE FACT THAN I'M HIS DAUGHTER BUT NOT HIS FRIENDS????I SERIOUSLY WONDER IF I'M EVEN HIS KID!!!!GOD FORGIVE ME BUT THATS WHAT HE MADE ME FEEL!!!!!TO HIM ME N MY BRO IS NOTHING BUT A PIECE OF USELESS JUNK TO HIM.....nothing we do is ever good enough for him...only what his friends kids does is the best....SERIOUSLY.....LIKE FOR EXAMPLE asking me to go study in a college that doesnt even hav the course that i want to study just becoz his friend said that its good coz its local n it has scholarship...ya right as if its that easy to obtain a scholarship if u dont hav a good result...and just becoz his friend said so or their kids r there.....that all BULLSHITTING STUFF!!!!SOMETIMES I REALLY WONDER IF I'M THE ONE STUDYING OR IS IT HIS FRIENDS KIDS!!!!to him its always his friend his friend,,,,its PATHETIC!!!REAL PATHETIC!!!!TO WHOEVER IT IS OUT THERE DONT EVEN BOTHER TELLING ME HIS MY DAD....ENOUGH OF THE CRAP..HEARD TO MUCH OF IT...COZ EVEN HE IS IT STILL DOESNT CHANGE THE FACT THAT I HATE HIM!!!!!GOD FORBID ME BUT THATS WHAT I JUST SAID.....NOTHING BUT THE PLAIN TRUTH.....ITS TIME TO REBEL!!!!!